anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung

No doubt some of you are familiar with the song ‘Get Here’ by Oleta Adams. You may not think you are, but if you’ve ever listened to adult contemporary radio, you’ve heard it. The song, apart from being a surprisingly comprehensive list of the modes of transport available in the modern world, is a sickeningly heartfelt piano ballad. It is also lodged in some deep and completely inaccessible recess of my brain that I cannot seem to wrest it from.

It’s the kind of song one might expect to hear as an accompaniment to ice dancing, or even some kind of choreographed gymnastic ribbon twirling. It is not the kind of song one wants playing over and over inside one’s skull.

You can reach me by sailboat, climb a tree and swing rope to rope
Take a sled and slide down slow, into these arms of mine
You can jump on a speedy colt, cross the border in a blaze of hope
I don't care how you get here, just get here if you can

I think I might vomit.

Comments

shut the hell up